Thanks for asking. I’m glad I didn’t ask myself a harder question.
Although there have been rumors of significant color augmentation, it’s still truish that Brunette started out as a brunette and Blonde as a … go ahead, you guess. But nature and nurture stirred a powerful cocktail of differences. Blonde liked to flirt, go fast, be noticed and talk and talk and talk and have a slight inclination towards drama. Brunette was quiet, well behaved, wanted to cook and sew and got in significantly less trouble of all types than Blonde. Not surprisingly to anyone with an IQ above room temperature in a meat locker, these personalities followed different paths for much of their lives. Actually one followed a path and the other hacked through the brush and drunkenly trampled on endangered species’ babies with her stilettos.
When the paths reconverged (it’s a word if I say it is) the hair color differences were now played out on a world stage and not just in a crappy little steel town in western Pennsylvania. On the first trip, to Turkey in 2002, Blonde was a powerful attention magnet. Blonde felt that this was a long overdue chance for the lucky men of Turkey to savor a fabulous specimen of American beauty and she was bathed in deserved adoration. Brunette (did I mention her mean streak?) said “Being with you is like being with a traveling freakshow”. She did not say this in what could be considered a congratulatory or appreciative tone. Her harsh theory was that Blonde wasn’t a splendid specimen but an oddity in the way that people would stare at perhaps a cyclops. (I don’t know why a cyclops came to mind as the example but I’m guessing they don’t have a group who will get together and sue me for insulting them. Watch me be wrong about that.)
Some advantages that accrue to Brunette are:
- Can carry anything she wants onto a plane and no one challenges her or gets pissed
- Gets to observe other cultures by blending in
- Has Blonde to pimp out as needed but doesn’t have to do the heavy lifting, so to speak
- Never (except in a bakery in Greece) produces automatic scorn/hatred
Some advantages that accrue to Blonde are:
- Has Brunette to carry things onto the plane for her when the gate agent is a fat and/or former Soviet Bloc country woman who will instantly, and a cellular level, despise Blonde
- Gets to give back by allowing other cultures the chance to observe her (see traveling freak show comment made earlier)
- Can talk a lot of men into a lot of things
- Gets to be the blonde and never humiliates herself by trying on a baseball cap with a brunette wig. There are no such caps!