Update: The cruise was cancelled! About 36 hours before we were scheduled to depart I received an email saying the ship had hit an iceberg and the cruise had to be cancelled. My hurried Plan B was a trip to Patagonia with the help of the wonderful people at Swoop Patagonia.
I have my reasons – more than 6 of them, actually
This is Blonde giving you the scoop in this post. I am thrilled to be going to Antarctica with Quark Expeditions® (in 23 days but who’s counting?). When I tell people they are either envious and say “that’s on my Bucket List” or they say “why would you want to do that?”. This post is to address the group that doesn’t understand my many excellent reasons for wanting to go to Antarctica.
Reason #1 – Antarctica is unlike anywhere else in the world
Admittedly that reason applies to other places too – maybe the Galapagos Islands for example. But those other places are in countries. Antarctica does not belong to any country (but I sure hope they have some sort of phony baloney passport stamp) and it is a continent.
Why is that important? They can’t be running election ads! People can’t be complaining about the government. Those two things alone currently use about 68% of the average U.S. citizen’s day.
People who don’t live and breathe travel may not think going to all 7 continents is a life goal but it is to me. For years I will be able to one-up people who mention how much they travel. Tell me that isn’t a worthy goal!
Reason # 2 – Antarctica is polite to their penguins
Several years ago Brunette and I went to South Africa. We loved the country and the people but they call their penguins “Jackass” penguins. That has to hurt.
But in Antarctica the penguins undoubtedly have better self-esteem because they’re called Chinstraps, Gentoos, the Adelie, and the Emperor. There are 17 breeds of penguins in the world but those 4 breeds exist only on Antarctica. They are (as am I) surrounded by a layer of protective blubber in order to be able to exist in Antarctica’s weather conditions.
Reason #3 – My protective blubber will vanish on the cruise to Antarctica
2015 has been a year of extensive travel; Cuba, Fiji, Germany, Hungary, the Czech Republic, Spain, Austria, Portugal, Colombia, Mexico and Slovenia. Each trip carries the weight of journalistic responsibility to extensively experience the food, wine and desserts. And that weight of responsibility results in the kind of weight that made the creator of Spanx a billionairess.
When I am not savoring the interesting cuisines and wines of the world I frequently eat at airports. I also sit – a lot – on planes, writing and just because it feels good.
So how am I going on a cruise and coming back a new slim(ish) me? Because I’m going on Quark’s Ocean Endeavour; the only health- and wellness-focused passenger ship in Antarctica.
When we’re at sea I will be eating healthy food, not packing in the pastries (yes, I mean you Portugal). There is also a fully equipped gym, yoga and stretching classes and a spa where my newly buff muscles can get rewarding massages.
Reason #4 – I will enhance my sporty credentials
I have hiked glaciers in Iceland, been thrown off horses in Canada and stayed on them in Greece and Iceland; snorkeled in a glacier in Iceland, gone swimming in the frigid Irish Sea at an inappropriate time of year; learned to scuba dive in Fiji, snorkeled with whale sharks twice and semi-mastered stand-up paddleboarding.
But I have never tried cross-country skiing, camping (God forbid), kayaking or a polar plunge in Antarctica. I will do at least one of these activities so I can perpetuate the fraud that I’m sporty and brave. And I will be photographed doing it because otherwise what would be the point?
Reason #5 – I will get new clothes for free!
I will get a yellow Quark parka included in my expedition (everyone does). It will be more attractive than the loaners a friend and I sportily sported in Iceland on a whale watch (above). We had to give those back. Quark gives you one to keep. (A friend is flying the whole way from Saskatchewan to join me on the Quark cruise and I swear the main reason she’s doing it is for the “free” parka.)
Quark Expeditions® also loans you the waterproof boots you need and you can rent, for a very reasonable fee, waterproof pants, walking sticks, backpacks or any other gear you may need. No buying a wardrobe for Antarctica and then having to move somewhere really cold so you can get your money’s worth out of it.
Not only does Quark ensure that you’ll have the right attire but when you get home you can wear your parka everywhere hoping someone asks about it so you can regale them with your adventures.
I live in southwest Florida and may look a little odd walking around in a yellow polar-grade parka but it will be worth it (and I tend to look a little odd anyway).
Reason #6 – I don’t have to learn another language or currency
This may not be entirely true because there are a lot of educational talks I plan to attend. They will speak some “polarese” such as frazil, slack pack (not my blubber), tabular berg and nunatak (something that definitely does not involve violence directed at nuns).
Because Antarctica isn’t a country you don’t have to figure out how to convert their currency. Quark Expeditions gives you a variety of currency options from which to choose (USDs, euros and some others I can’t find on their website now) so if you feel an urge to splurge onboard you can conveniently do so.
A whole lot of other reasons that are important to more serious people
Quark Expeditions® has been doing this a long time. They’ve won numerous awards including 2014’s World’s Leading Specialist Cruise Line Award at the World Travel Awards™. They were also named one of National Geographic Traveler’s 50 Tours of a Lifetime for their “Three Arctic Islands” voyage.
They take safety very seriously and have a doctor on board as well as having ships that are specially equipped for the conditions. (Pay a lot of attention to what a cruise line says about safety when you select one. A certain blonde learned this the hard way as she was tossed wildly about an ill-prepared ship in the Koro Sea.)
They really go to Antarctica. Huh? A lot of huge cruise ships go past Antarctica and you have very little if any chance to actually disembark and explore. You basically wave at it.
Not so with Quark Epeditions® – hence the horrifying possibility of camping.
Quark Expeditions® has a long record of environmental responsibility and an impressive array of sustainability initiatives. They also contribute to a selection of worthwhile charities in the region (check the link because the only one I can remember is a cosmetology school for penguins).
Thought-provoking conclusion/query
Who wouldn’t want to go to Antarctica with Quark Expeditions®?